“‘How to not lose friends when you suffer from abandonment based anxiety’ 

“‘How to not lose friends when you suffer from abandonment based anxiety’ –

I have been feeling as if this is a truly important one to talk about, especially as it relates to the imbalanced empath, and is something that I struggled with for a long time, especially in relationships. Many of my earlier relationships ended pretty badly, me being heart broken, (I mean absolutely broken), and wondering if I was ever born to be loved..now I was caught in this recurring loop of attracting lovers, having passionate and highly emotive connections, and then a few or several months down the line, being abandoned by these same people who I once shared an intense energy with. It was truly a pattern, the partners changed, but the pattern did not, and it was not until I became conscious that I found what was truly going wrong. In doubting that I was lovable and worthy of staying with, I unconsciously drew experiences that mirrored my lack of belief in myself. My anxieties were tied into the fact that deep down, I held the belief that I would always be abandoned, because I wasn’t worthy or good enough for anybody to want to stick around. I would panic over the slightest inclination that I was about to be abandoned, or that I wasn’t truly loved, and this in turn would behave as a self fulfilling prophecy and ensure that yes, I would be abandoned. So without further ado.. Step 1. Try to listen carefully and consistently to everything that is said by others. Do not listen with the ears that say you already know what they mean or what they are trying to say. Yes you may be highly empathic and intuitive, but your thoughts of fear are very likely to override any inner knowing that you hold. 2. Take the time to breathe, count to ten in your head, and write down anything that you are unsure of, if you are having a conversation and feel that you have picked up on a worrisome cue. A lot of the time things are lost in translation over technology, so it is important to note that we know what the person we are talking to is really trying to bring across. 3. If you feel that somebody has an insulting or threatening tone in their conversation, (including the threat of abandonment), try consulting somebody you trust about what they have said. Seek the opinion of somebody who does not have such high anxieties over the situation and can give you greater insight. 4. Understand that your anxious energy may come across too over powering and even controlling to some who do not understand why you require such constant reassurance. Whilst you may be dripped in worry, try to remember that other people you are dealing with have feelings also, and try to be conscious of the way that you approach them. 5. Deal with the issues internally that suggest to you that others will abandon you, and that there is something within you unworthy of them staying. Understand that you are worthy, lovable, capable, and appreciated. Why wouldn’t anybody want to keep you around?”Cindy Anneh-bu (via spiritualpoet) #anxiety #depression #mentalhealth #ptsd #spiritual #empath #writer

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spiritualpoet

From a very early age, it was clear to see that my path was one paved with difference. Inspiration, intuition, and imagination gripped me long before I could find my feet. I walk the life path of 7, so I am irreversibly bound to the realm of mysticism, spiritualism, and esotericism. I do not belong to this world, for I am a 'tween', always in between worlds. I am the commander of serpents, belonging to the glorious, and forbidden 13th zodiac of ophiuchus. Hidden in secrecy, to one day return as the divine feminine awakens. Love, is my speciality, and has governed my existence. I now use a combination of intuition, natural healing ability, astrology, psychology, sociology, and numerology to bring clarity, healing, and understanding to all. With the energy of ophiuchus running through me, I could never turn away from the path of healing, nor teaching. Not only does ophiuchus represent healing, but also the crevices of the dark shadows that we must crawl through to find our path to healing, in other words, the shamanic process of death, and re-birth, which has pretty much been the summation of my existence thus far. Long gone are my days of depression, I have re-claimed my divinity, and I desire nothing more than to help you to also claim yours. Not only the seeker, I am also the lover. Part of the many trials that I have endured upon this empathic journey, are that of heart break, and abandonment consciousness. For this reason, I have become an advocate for healthy loving relationships, and the harmony between the two sexes. This has taken me on a deep quest, to uncover ancient old secrets, and deeply entrenched beliefs, about man, about woman, and what this reads about where we are to. My eternal life drive and motto revolves around this simple theory, 'Where there is an outcome, there has existed a cause'. My particular areas of interest and expertise lie with sociology, psychology, spiritualism, philosophy, and literary, and creative writing. As I have a deeply intense desire to both serve, and aid humanity, I have naturally been drawn toward topics that have provided me with a more in depth account of societal behaviour, and as it stands, human kind. My roots are as deeply rooted as they can be, stemming from Ghanaian parents, who were raised, and both skilled in the art, and knowledge of superstition, and divination wisdom, it is no surprise that the blood flowing through my veins compels me to do such work, so relentlessly. Unlike other bloggers, this work featured here is not a mere hobby, it is more than just my livelihood, it is the calling of which i cannot ignore. Another prominent focus of mine, is mental illness. Not comfortable, nor fully sold with the western idealisms of the implications of such, i seek research, personal experience, and observation to prove, that many mental illnesses hold spiritual connotation, particularly as the mind is an avid translator of spiritual energies. Follow me on this journey as i discover myself, retrace my roots, fall deeply in love with my heritage, and finally accept my awkward, unorthodox societal position. To book one of my services, and allow me to guide you back to the soul, email me via cindyanneh-bu@hotmail.co.uk I offer dream interpretation, tarot reading, therapy, numerology readings, and see through the eyes of the lover.. To contact me across all of my platforms, follow me on instagram to keep up with my latest quotes, and mystically inclined photography @spiritualpoetess_ To keep up with my snappy, sassy, and spiritually laced motivational tweets, find me on twitter @spiritualpoet_ Facebook like page https://www.facebook.com/Twinflameandshamanchronicles

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