Spirituality is not about being positive, always- it is about shining a light on the aspects of yourself that are not positive, always.
Shamanism actually is dependent upon ones ability to travel to the underworld (shadow self), and retrieve lost soul fragments..
From my experiences, and the knowledge, and the wisdom that i have accumulated over my years since recognising my spirituality, i have found that both loss, and pain, go pretty much hand, in hand, and are tied into spiritual evolution. Every time that i have experienced an accelerated transformation in spirituality, and mental, and emotional clarity, i have just recently found myself at the pit of emotional despair.
The correlation between spiritual growth, and sacrifice through pain, are not entirely new theories, and you may even say that they have been present in traditional scripture, such as Christ, sacrificing himself to death, for the good of all man kind, only to be resurrected in a ‘light body’ state a few days later, assumed to be much closer to the divine, and having shed what some may perceive to be the ego self.
However, we do not even have to look so far to human sacrifice in the case of offerings from God. We can search a little closer to tribal spiritual fascinations, for instance African spiritual systems, and those derivative, where animals, such as small chickens, and sometimes goats, are’sacrificed’ in order to appease the Gods.
Now, what may at first glance seem like a very sadistic, and masochistic version of events, could alternatively, be seen in a light where the offering of such suffering, or sacrifice, plays into, and stirs, the very nature of a death and rebirth theme, that life, and especially the divine, concerns itself with.
In many tribal cultures, especially shamanism, depression, and other mental illnesses are actually viewed as an influx of spiritual stimuli, and what some refer to as possession. It is only after one travels deep into the crevices of their doom, that they are met with guides who instruct them of what to do, how to heal themselves, and essentially, how to become a healer for others. This is the belief. Suffering begets some kind of power, or some kind of revelation from the spirit world, that we may utilise to bring resolution to both ourselves, and others.
The idea of darkness, and light existing in co-operation, the ever dancing state of balance, the yin, in accordance with the yang, the masculine, working side by side with the feminine, the light, concerning itself only with matters of the dark – because without one, the other knows no breath.
This very polarity is incredibly inherent in what we refer to as, ‘twin flames’, or divine union. These sacred types of partnership are all about recognising, and integrating the aspects of our shadow selves, if we are to experience spiritual cleansing, and wholeness. The facet that i feel like religion neglects, is the suppression, and the denial of lower aspects of ourselves, essentially our shadow. We are taught to be ashamed of these aspects of the self. ‘Sin’, as it is called.
However, when the twin flame arrives in our lives, they will usually be somehow taboo, or there will be some degree of the relationship that may be seen as betrayal, or not socially, or openly accepted by all. This is so that we are confronted with our own shadow selves, the mirrors of who we are, and the wrong that we do, reflected by the judgements of our society. We must fully let go of the egoic beliefs that we have collected along the way, that call for us to shame, and shun our shadow selves. Our shadow selves are merely a reflection of these societies, and communities that we come from, so why should we shut them away? Rather, we should pierce them open, and listen to what they have to say..Allow them to kill our egotistical perceptions of perfection, and what it means for love, and life, to be perfect.
In an episode where Phoebe travelled into her past life, she became aware that she used to be evil. For this reason, when she fell in love with Cole, who was partly, (sometimes completely) evil, she became struck with the thought, perhaps there something inside of her that was attracting this evil? That enabled her to be more susceptible to evils? Well, yes..She was an empath. And all empaths will be familiar with experiencing relationships in which we have attracted lowly vibrating partners. Whilst these relationships nearly tore us apart, every time that we come out of them, we have a greater understanding, and appreciation, for love, the good, and the bad. Including what it means to love somebody who does not necessarily know how to accept love.
But Cole was not all evil – well, not all of the time. He was actually half human, and it was his human half that enabled him to fall in love deeply with Phoebe. So in a way, they both had parts of each other already existing within themselves. This element of being a hybrid is also present in twin flames, who hold immense energy for either creation, or destruction, and can be swayed either way.
Their love, made him want to be good. So much so that he battled with himself, the good and evil within himself, (the soul, and the ego), relentlessly. Upon meeting, he knew that in order to be with her, he could no longer proceed with his ways of being, and doing, though this was what came so naturally to him before. Who he was. What he knew. This struggle is also present in twin flames embodying the masculine energy. Do they leave behind what they know, in order to pursue their love? And if they do, does this not mean losing themselves..And losing their power?
Their love, made her want to be rebellious. To challenge the status quo. What was not usually done, she would do for love. She would go the extra mile, despite how her sisters may have viewed her as weak, irresponsible, or gullible.
This is also present within the twin flame feminine gene pool – her friends, and family in the 3D world looking on in horror, confusion, and dismay as she continues to pursue somebody who is seemingly all wrong for her.
The great loss.
We experience this great loss in the form of an ego death, but it is also in separation from our twin. Phoebe making the decision to vanquish Cole, is symbolic of her releasing her lower self, her egoic self, and allowing that part of who she is, to dissolve, until there is nothing left but self – all by herself. She came to understand, that this sacrifice, was for the greater good, despite what it had cost her. This is why the separation period feels so very painful, because during this time, we are shedding all of our belief systems, thoughts, and energetic patterns, until we are left with nothing but us, raw, in our entirety. And it is mighty painful. But..After, Phoebe vanquished Cole, her life took a surprising new turn. She was able to throw herself in to her work, and find herself in ways that she had not previously been able to. She became self actualised, more independent, a fighter for herself, and her truth, and having withstood the deepest, and the darkest love one could know, she was entirely transformed. I also believe that this gave her the much needed courage to later step into her empathic abilities, and the weight that they presented her with.. The ultimate sacrifice, paid off.
How the loss of Prue transformed Piper.
Before losing Prue, Piper was the more timid of the three sisters. Stuck in the middle, she was not truly sure of her space, or who she was. She was working in a restaurant at one point, in which she wasn’t truly happy, when her actual goal, was to open up her own restaurant. She later became the owner of P3. However, it was not until the death of Prue that she truly became self actualised. The grief, and the anger from the loss coincided perfectly with her newly gained power, the ability to blow things up, as opposed to only being able to freeze things – metaphorical for the acceleration of her energies. This was JUST the fire power, and kick start she needed, and it could not have come at a better time. This new found self belief, determination, and fire power were just the appropriate ingredients needed to vanquish the source!
Buffy, and Angel too were apart of a divine partnership in which the love was perceived to be forbidden. Good and bad. Morality, versus evil – the themes that plague all twin flame unions. Once again, for the purposes of transmutation, to come into the knowledge that the darknesses exists within the light, and the light exists because of the darkness.
Angel too was separate from the typical vampire, the way that Cole was separate from the typical demon, just as the divine masculine is separate from the average man. Where Cole was actually half human, Angel had a soul, which rendered him different from all of the other vampires. He had a conscience, and the moment that he saw Buffy arrive in Sunny dale, he fell in love with her, and he knew that through her, he wanted to be a better man. He did not necessarily understand how it would be done, but he knew that it would be.
The temptation to revert back to his old ways, and to give into his lower nature was represented here externally by the presence of Spike, and mostly, Drusilla. Drusilla represented a part within him where darkness reigned supreme, and was associated with passion, power, and conquest. Whereas with Buffy, he could be his true self – what felt comfortable, what felt right, what felt like ‘home’. Just like with Cole, in order to revert him back to his evil nature, both Spike and Drusilla played upon the idea that we was somehow weak for giving into her, and giving into his love for her – an idea that was enough to enrage him to prove the illegitimacy of these notions – in protest.
Because of a gypsy curse placed upon him ions ago, for his sins, it is in the moment that Angel feels the most love, that he is triggered to once again turn evil (to confront his shadow self), and this takes place after him and Buffy have become intimate. Much like the ‘Bubble love phase’, which lasts for twins from a few weeks, to a few months, before their old karma is brought up to be cleared, once, and for all.
She too, had to commit the ultimate sacrifice later, killing Angel, in order to stop him from wreaking any-more havoc on anybody else.Though her heart knew great loss, through this, it also came to know great strength, and resilience.
In one of the most heart breaking televisions scenes, the episode, ‘the body’, sees Buffy losing her mother, after coming home to find her dead on the sofa. The events that play out after this, involve Buffy becoming a big sister, finding greater strength in her abilities, and developing a far more responsible, and serious attitude toward life in general. It is this type of loss that brings us closer to our true nature. That allows us to realise what is truly important, and what isn’t, and to fully step into our roles, and destinies, and what they require from us. Knowing such loss, allows us to know ourselves. The capacity of the human heart, and of the internal strength that we hold, is more than enough to convince you of the existence of the divine, and to bring you closer to such a knowing. The cycle of life. Death, and rebirth, and the blessings that such loss brings. Disguised, ofcourse, for if they were anything else, our lessons would not be retrieved.
There is no transformative element, like love.
© Seek Cindy 2016
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