Client V’s reading. Romantic life path, name interpretation, advice, and tarot.

  
Name interpretation –

In ancient times, the name Vivienne was actually the name of Merlin, (the famous wizards mistress). For this reason, the name is often associated with a woman who is strong, powerful, magic, and enchanting. She is independent, free from patriarchal dominance, and does not adhere to regular stereotypes. It can also be suggested that she is a watchful keeper, as she watches all of Merlin’s Magic, and takes notes for her own. 
Romantic life path calculation.

Astonishingly, both you, and your love interest are of the life path of 8.

The life path of 8 is associated with longevity, financial success, breaking free from restriction, and oppression, and liberation.
For this reason, it is very likely for number 8’s to enjoy freedom, travel, new adventures, and also their independence. Number 8’s may appreciate change very much, although they are quite structured and prefer for things to be done a certain way.
The number 8 has a fear of failure, and a fear of vulnerability. They would rather wrap up their emotions and keep them close to their heart than share what is going on with them. A number 8 stuck in a stagnant and unfulfilling may very well just disappear, leaving their partner guessing, and leaving them wondering what happened to the relationship.
This is because the number 8’s are not one for confrontation. They may appear self assured and structured on the surface, but beneath they have long struggled with self expression, and standing up for themselves.
The number 8 is caught in a strange world. Trapped between a deep sensitivity, and a deep desire to shield this sensitivity.
I believe that your love is on the dawn of a new horizon. He is experiencing and undergoing life trials and tribulations that are causing him to look within himself and take a greater guess at who he might be. This has been a difficult year for him, with a lot of growth. I see travelling in his destiny. So perhaps if he has not yet already travelled this is something that he will be doing so.
He is feeling slightly hopeless, and boxed in. Not necessarily by you, but by forces beyond his control. His career. His finance. And his joy. He is not fully satisfied within himself, and right now his focus lies on getting himself out of this pickle. It is not that he does not want your love, rather love, is pretty much the last thing on his mind right now. 
You also may be feeling on the edge, as if you are nearing a monumental life change, and this is true, you are. Sometimes, the reason why we try to cling so feverishly to the past is because we know that we are about to embark on a brand new journey, and that can be frightening by any amounts. In your heart of hearts, you are aware that you were beginning to wonder if this relationship had any particular pattern, or purpose, or if it were simply a case of breaking up, and making up, in a cycle. 

Although, your familiarity and comfort ability with the scenario would have never allowed you to question your heart.
Your heart is ready to expand, to take on new imprints, places, and experiences, and it needs the safety and the reassurance of your heart to do so.
My best advice; let go.

Letting go does not necessarily mean moving onto the next person that you see, or suddenly declaring that you no longer love your lover. But letting go is all about surrendering to the universe, and to divine will.
You have issues regarding needing to control the outcome of things, and needing constant reassurance, this is a trait of the ego, and now we are trying to slip back into heart consciousness. I believe that you are very sensitive deep down and have a lot of love to give, and you probably felt as if this space that you held with him wasn’t large enough to give and receive all of the love that you desire.
Surrendering is about not holding on to one, or any outcome for that matter. Anything can happen, at any time, for any reason. And that is beauty. That is the ultimate excitement, and ONLY promise of life, – the unknown, embrace it.
I want you to live your life, I want you to be happy. I see how much it means to you to achieve your dreams, to grow, and to leave the old behind. He is apart of that ‘old’. But know, that if something is yours, it will always return, and the universe will arrange the necessary movements for them to be received. But our lives should never be put on hold, or pause at the expense of another. This habitual behaviour is unhealthy, and mentally, can be linked to the physical act of hoarding. We only hoard when we feel that we are in a position of lack, and cannot afford to lose anymore.
Your tarot reading-

What is in my heart/hearts desire?

Knight of wands.
The knight of wands is all a card about charging through, entering a situation with confidence and bravery, and exercising the strengths that we require to fulfil our dreams. You have big vision, and rightly so. You are creative, a natural leader, and can lead others into success also. You have a message that needs provision.
It is time to put your foot to the peddle and bring your plans into fruition. Currently, the only thing, and person standing in your way is you. You may find yourself continuously, and consistently on the edge, always making excuses for why now is ‘not the time’, why you are ‘not ready’, and how you are ‘not prepared’. Truly, you should know that all of this is not only utter nonsense, but just procrastination on your part. Let go of comfortable settings now, because it will not serve you any better than it has in the past.
Repeat this mantra, ‘I am ready to accept newness into my life with open arms. I will chase my dreams, no matter how far I may go, or where they may take me. I am my own safety net’.
What is in my loves heart?

The ten of swords.
The ten of swords is a card all about fulfilment, resolution, and seeing that our needs and goals are met. If one is currently undergoing a hazy, difficult, or confusing period, this card points to their deep desires to ‘make things right’, and find themselves.

The love of your life is not a bad person, no, neither is he an evil person. He may appear sometimes selfish, and inconsiderate when it comes to emotion, but this is because he has never truly learnt how to deal with these emotions, and his best response is to put them aside, much like he does with himself.
He is searching so hard for a route, for a way for him to take to escape the mental fog that he is feeling, but he does not realise that this fog persists for the very fact that he is casting his emotions aside, for it is his emotions that will lead him to his souls truth. I also gain the sense that he is here for a very special purpose, possibly to teach young men about some of the struggles that he has had to endure in his life.
Maybe even mentoring children with sport, or basketball. Though he must dig within and realise that the things that bind him also bind others just like him, and he must not be so hard on himself, or the world.
He is aware that he has a calling, he just does not know what this calling is YET, and this near enough keeps him up at night. He is ambitious, with many ideas, but none that he is necessarily sure how to implement. He sees others around him doing well, even you in his eyes, and he is just so ready to gain some sort of a foot in the doorway.
What is my greatest obstacle?

Ace of pentacles.
The ace of pentacles is the card of newness, new beginnings, new projects, and a new business or job venture that will provide long term happiness, and substantiality.
Your mind is abuzz, and your heart aflame with possible ideas, and projects. There are so many of your talents that you can merge to create something that will benefit others for generations to come. And you are not meant for mundane routine, you despise this, regardless of whether you have used it in the past to take your focus away from the emotional struggles of life. 
You are still Holding onto fears about being good enough, or about making it, and thriving in a world where there is so much competition, and so much talent. Understand that your own talents are unique. And the most high blessed no two souls with the exact same knowing, or execution of such knowing. Whilst there may exist similar projects of products to those that you wish to introduce, it is you as a niche, and your marketing as an individual that will make all of the difference.
Do not be afraid of a fresh start. It is perfectly okay not to know what happens next. 
What is the best course of action that I should take?

Queen of wands.
The queen of wands is balanced, happy, in control, and in charge. She has managed to balance the material realm, with the spiritual realm, and thus she is fulfilled both financially, and spiritually. It may have taken some time for her to cultivate this level of togetherness, but she learned to appreciate herself on every step of the journey, so that she was never too hard on herself.
The best course of action for you to take is self actualisation. Before you reach a period that you feel that you have gained success and happiness, it is still perfectly okay, (in fact advisable), to appreciate where you currently are on your journey. This will help to take away some of the fear that you are feeling. There is no fear of being a failure, if you recognise that you are already a success! Yes, you. All of the trials that you have endured on the way, and made your way out of, have turned you into a thriving success, and a fighter!
You must find, or rather create a profession in which you are fulfilled by all means. The life path 8 holds a ravenous appetite for financial success, and ambition, and the dangerous part is that they are often willing to sacrifice their happiness and health to achieve this. Do not be this side of the number 8. Understand that there are other things that matter just as much as financial achievement, such as soundness of mind.
What am I to learn from this relationship?

The king of pentacles.
The king of pentacles represents a man who is powerful, in charge, in control, masculine, but also generous, and giving.
When this tarot appears, it teaches you how to utilise masculine energies, those associated with power, drive, and seizing that which you desire. Often, we require life situations that challenge our growth, to knock us off our feet and focus on the areas of our life that we most need to tweak, and tune.
Instead of establishing your business ideas or chasing your goals, you may have remained stagnant instead choosing matters of the heart, and allowing this to disturb your willingness to proceed. Perhaps now with separation from your love, you can turn your passion and efforts into nurturing something that you can truly be proud of. This is also mirroring his desire to find this kind of drive and strength within himself. Understand that on the most fundamental level, the desire to be the provider, and to earn a living is more important to the male psyche than most can imagine. It is engrained into their DNA. This hunger could teach you a lot about stepping out into the world as a powerful source of change. Do not sit on your ideas, rather.. Prepare to sit on your throne.
I thoroughly hope that you have enjoyed this reading my love,

And I look forward to any comments/questions that you have for me at the end.
Kindest regards,

Seek Cindy.
To book your own reading..

  
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© 2015 Cinderella Anneh-bu

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Twin Flames; A timeless journey through space. – Numerology. Book sample; a cleansing of the templates. 

  
Status: awaiting release.

  
Some of the twin flame templates that arise and cause friction, are the ways in which both twins view the opposite sex, and the ways in which both twins view themselves.

The theme of jealousy and triggering will be re-occurring, as twins get a chance to see how it is that they truly feel about themselves.

Has this theme been heavily prevalent in previous relationships? Perhaps previous life times, and what does it Serve to teach?

Oh, the universe is so clever. Like making twin flames accidentally stumble across a picture of their twin with another, or viewing somebody who they believe to be a threat to their twin flame Union – the triggering possibilities are endless! But one thing is for sure, they cause you to look within, and understand where your lack of self love is coming from. Remember, that your twin flame is in love with your heart, enamoured with your soul, he or she does not see anybody else as your competition, whether they consciously recognise this to be true,  or not. You must work to ensure that your foundation is not so shaky that jealousy can still halt you to your knees. You are a unique vibration. Unique in every single sense of the word.

Try to practice brain re-wiring, not jumping to conclusions, and searching for logical reasoning, instead of reverting to old models of thinking. Why does your twin being photographed with another, or even being with another make you doubt your worth? Or the joy you feel within yourself. Remember that the ultimate goal is not to be reliant upon another for your self gratification. 

Twin flame popular numbers and themes in numerology.

The number 8. The number 8 is one of the main twin flame numbers in numerology. For the number 8 takes the form of the infinity symbol, and the imagery of two wholes joining together to form one complete unit. The number 8 also represents stability, success, and freedom from restriction.

The number 11 is probably the most common, and recognised twin flame digits, commonly represented as 11:11, the wake up gate way. The number 11 is also all about two pairs, as represented by its form in the shape of two up-right pillars. This is the number signalling spiritual evolution, energy channeling, and higher awareness. The master number, and usually reflects itself either as a life path of a twin, joint life path number, date of birth, date of meeting, or otherwise. It is also a number with heavy karmic vibration.

The number 9 seems to be the less commonly recognised, or at least discussed twin flame numbers. The number 9 represents service to humanity, completion, and wholeness. Also regarded as a number of spiritual sacrifice, the 9 is all about compassion, and tends to carry a wounded healer connotation. Popular life path 9s includes the late, but great, Bob Marley.

Seven. The number seven is often called upon as the most spiritual number, and the vibration of God. So it is no surprise if a twin flame holds this number as a life path, or if this number appears as a twin flame signalling call.

555 – The number 5 is all about change, progression, and new experiences. The number 5, 05:05, or 5:55 May make itself apparent when we have been actively working on self improvement, or to signal to us that things are achieving progress in the twin flame journey, or healing/re-Union is near.
© 2015
All works published on this site are under strict ownership of the owner, and any re-destribution is strictly prohibited without permission, and necessary credits.
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3 reasons why I rejected religion, and abhorred God; a spiritual perspective.

  
Before I begin this article, I would just like to state that all views expressed here are entirely my own, are not intended to criticise any one way of thinking, believing or worship, and are simply my own interpretation of my own truths.

1. ‘Just pray to God’.

  
Whilst I truly do believe in the positive power of prayer, and intension/ channeling, (talking to and receiving messages from the divine), for the longest time, I grew absolutely sick of being told this, as a solution to everything – including depression! At one point, one really needs to stand up and take responsibility for their own lives, and understand how everything inside of them, reflects everything outside of them. It is no sense using prayer as an escape goat from actually working through your issues, and striving to make a change. In other words, you cannot simply sit at home from day, to day, yet pray to feel rain fall on your skin. Sure, you could always go and take a hot shower, but the actual novelty of rain will escape you, lest you go outside. This is my belief with prayer, much like my belief with positive thinking, it only works when conjoined with positive action, and opportunity. And it is not a solution in itself. A belief of this kind can prove misleading, even shattering to the one who interprets it conclusively. And telling somebody with a mental illness simply to pray their sadness away, is boarder line insensitive, not to mention rooted in out dated cultural stigma.

2. ‘The institution baddies’

  
Now, this next one goes for any spiritual, or religious institution, as I am sure that it does not only extend to the Christian church, although this is where my experiences took place. Have you ever gathered with a congregation, only to feel the intense burning of sideways glances, or over competitively dressed church goers? Well, it does not stop there. From as long as I could remember, some of the most arrogant, ill mannered, and obnoxious people always seemed to fly the God flag the highest, and be the most dedicated of church goers. I did not understand this. If church was supposed to be a holy place of worship, and the belief in God was supposed to grant you some type of moral superiority, then why ever were these people so, pardon me – but ghastly! It seemed to me that God was just not enough, not enough to change who they were, or simply, that God did not exist. If he did, surely these people would be saved by his glory, no?

Well, whilst I still do not feel like sharing the same ‘God’, with these types of individuals, spirituality has given me the freedom to see that these people are actually souls who are in pain, and their ‘connection’ with God, is merely a substitute for their connection with themselves. Ancient doctrine itself dictates, the Kingdom of God dwells within. The key to truly finding this essence, is truly finding, and understanding ones self. And attendance to a religious institution does not grant you this knowing, or ensure a jar tight guarantee of ‘righteous behaviour’. 

3. The paradox of original sin, polarity, and the concept of damnation.

  

Undoubtably, on the journey to finding myself, and finding the God within, the hardest aspect was the belief that although we were all sinners, our sins were constantly being tallied up, and one day, dependent on our luck, we may be sent to eternal damnation for our sins, (that were original, that we couldn’t help). Exactly – dumb founded. 

On my road to finding myself, I had found that most of my depression was a result of not forgiving myself for my shadow aspects, and the mistakes that I had made upon my path. The threat of being punished, abandoned, or cast out for my sins had already been deeply embedded by religious doctrine.

Honestly, the threat of being cast out of the ‘Kingdom of heaven’, is not only boarder line abusive, but can also stir up some pretty intense abandonment issues.

You absolutely cannot deny your darkness, nor can you suppress parts of yourself that are deemed traditionally, ‘unholy’. This only causes greater frustration, and deterrence from your true nature, which is good – not riddled with some sort of automatic sin! Yes, human kind is imperfect by nature, we grow, and learn through our mistajes, and none of this warrants eternal damnation, particularly not from an all forgiving, omniscient force. 
Cinderella Anneh-bu

© 2015
All works published on this site are under strict ownership of the owner, and any re-destribution is strictly prohibited without permission, and necessary credits.

Twin Flame, Karmic Attachment, and co-dependency? How not to get taken advantage of in love. 

  
Twin flames, and karmic attachments are both soul mirrors to us, in a sense. Both unions provide the opportunity for us to see any emotional/energetic blockages that have been stored within us, as well as useful, and not so useful patterns that we have developed from our parents, cultures, and societies.

Now of course twin flames are the ultimate mirror, and ultimate emphasiser of what goes on underneath, and what parts of us are destructive, and what need healing, but karmic attachments also attempt to point us in these directions toward wholeness, by typically mirroring back to us the worst kind of relationship that we could EVER imagine!

If you are caught in a karmic attachment, then you are fully aware that something does NOT feel right, and it never has. You frequently find yourself feel anxious, depressed, unworthy, and almost as if you have to constantly, and consistently earn your partners affections. When I myself was caught in a karmic attachment, I became even more mentally unwell than I already was. Days were spent crying over my loves lack of affection, and BLATENT lack of interest, and then I would switch in between messaging him excessively, and trying to pour my heart out to him, in order to gain some sort of sub par response – which I barely ever did.  

  
The point I want to make here is, none of this ever stopped me. None of the tears over being unappreciated, or his re-affirmation to me continuously that he did not want a relationship, and did not want to be committed to me, ever stopped me from running after him, continually expressing my love for him, and giving myself to him fully.

I did not care that he was not in love with me. As long as he gave me something that remotely resembled love. I did not care that he did not want a relationship. (As long as he occasionally fathomed interest, even if it was only of the sexual kind). I did not care that he would go hours, upon hours before responding to any of my messages, (though my intuition always told me that he had seen them before hand), as long as he eventually did reply. 

And sure enough, there I would be, phone in hand, waiting anxiously for his arrival, for a notification that he had actually remembered and acknowledged my existence. That was enough to satisfy my heart into thinking that I was relevant. 

This was possibly one of the worst forms of abuse that I had ever endured. And what made it so terrible? Was that it was self inflicted. I did not have to keep chasing after him. I did not have to keep allowing myself to be treated this way. At any time that I wanted to, I could have cut contact, told him that I wanted nothing more to do with him, and that I deserved better. But the key point here, is that I did not. 

Somewhere buried deep within me, perhaps not as deep as I thought, existed the belief that I was deserving of this kind of treatment. That I was deserving of minimal displays of love, and that I was worthy of being ignored, repeatedly. I know now that this is because I was not fully showing up as myself. So how could I ever expect that somebody else would show up for me? How could I expect to have somebody who was fully open, and available to me, when I was not even fully open and available to myself? I was avoiding myself, desperately. I was so in need of me, so in need of ‘fixing’, and I tried to avoid this responsibility, by passing it on to somebody else to follow. Somebody who, through no disrespect, was never the man for the job. 

  
So, why did I put up with so much of this unnecessary pain when it was as simple as getting up and leaving? Announcing that I deserved more, and then proceeding to go and actually find more? 

And the simplest answer? I absolutely loathed myself. Yes, I did. The way that I was treating myself, reflected the way that he had been treating me, and the way that I had once been treated in childhood, so this feeling was familiar, so I did not see too much need to fight it, nor rock the boat.

This was a man who was emotionally Unavailable, shut down, and unable to utter any words, or actions that mimicked commitment, or intimacy. Yet here I was, a hopeless romantic, with an expansive heart chakra, holding onto him with everything that I had, and refusing to go anywhere! Honestly, I was borderline obsessive, and I thought that this was love. I thought that the momentary high that I received when he showed me the slightest bit of recognition was worth all of the lows. I thought that it was happiness. And all because I was holding onto all of these patterns, inherited from generations before me, and all of these beliefs attached to low self esteem, and the attraction of pain.

  
Remember that thing that I said about mirrors? About how these types of unions show us the parts of ourselves that desire recognition? Well yes, I did not love myself, or appreciate myself, neither did I want to commit to myself, so I attracted this soul who manifested these very same issues. 

Now, this is the objective of karmic attachments. I like to view them as sort of, a curse, let me explain this. This does not mean to say that these types of unions are inherently bad, or evil, because if you view them in this way, then you will never heal or move on from them. 

A curse is something unpleasant that can remain trapped within somebody, or within a particular line of people, occurring over, and over again, in a loop, until it is broken. This is exactly what a karmic attachment is. The particular attachment that I am describing lasted just over 3 years, but trust me, I know people who have been stuck in these types of unions for 7+ years, they are THAT addictive, especially when you just cannot pry your eyes, and your mind to see beyond what is directly infront of you.

If only we could all look a little bit deeper into ourselves, if only, we would find the world existing only as we are, and then we would realise how to overcome our negative experiences, and use them for outward healing purposes.

What is co-dependency and anxious attachment style?

Co dependency and anxious attachment style in psychology, are the exact reasons that so many empaths, healers, or light workers, tend to experience so many karmic attachments throughout their lives, and many eventually, also the twin flame union. 

These are terms that describe the behaviours of somebody who is so fixated on attaining love, and feeling wanted, and needed, that they continuously neglect themselves. The behaviours that we associate with these terms are needy, clingy, obsessive, and draining. Though they may not mean to behave in these ways, these souls are so bruised, they are always searching for cues that their beloved will leave them, and will resort to extreme, and manipulative tactics to stop this from happening. 

Doesn’t sound much like a healer?

Do not forget all about the birth of a healer. Before a healer steps into their rightful position as a healer, they are practically injected with all of these pains, all of these emotional, energetic, and generational downloads, that they must transmute, and release. This is not an easy task, particularly for the healer who does not know that they are a healer, and is just trying to live a ‘normal’, and neat life. 

The abuse of self will continue in these unions, until the empath learns that this is not love, this is dysfunction, and the only way out, is in, within ones self. 

Twin flames, and the terrible tales.

Because of all of the false information depicted about twin flames on the internet, many people have adopted the belief that twin flame unions are these happy, hippy dippy perfect relationships, where everything runs smoothly, and perfectly. This is so far from the truth. Those of us who are actually apart of, or have experienced a twin flame Union, will know how difficult, confusing, and painful that this Union can be. 

This is the ULTIMATE mirror relationship, and every single drop of your emotional, mental, and spiritual baggage, will be dragged to the surface, and you will BOTH have to deal with them. 

For this reason, it is a misconception that the twin flame Union can be void of ill treatment. Yes, your twin flame can still be disrespectful, unappreciative, and inconsiderate towards you. Remember, that they are also now dealing with many life times of baggage, and unwanted realisations. This can make a person incredibly selfish, confused, and depressed. (However, there is always a line, and you should be able to decipher when, and whether somebody is being outwardly abusive. Abusive relationships are NOT to be confused with this dynamic).

And this does not mean that you have to take it, nor that you have to accept it, under the guise of ‘divine love’, divine love feels divine. And does not feel like neglect.

This is the main reason why I say that this Union is all about you, designed to heal you, and bring you back to you. This is to break the chain of co-dependent, and self defeating relationships that you have endured, not exhasperate them. Your twin flame arrived as a lesson to you, not to just see you doing all of the same things, that you have always done. Remember that concept of the curse that I was telling you about?

Work on yourself. Break this chain. Allow your twin/karmic attachment to work on themselves. You can still hold unconditional love for them in your heart, whilst believing in, and exercising your right for self love and self respect. 

Many healers, and intuitives dare not say this, but what the hell, I am a little ris-que, don’t you dare be afraid to date soul mates during the ‘separation stage’. Don’t you dare be afraid to live, to feel, to explore love… But don’t you dare forget to heal either! 

This was your great awakening, do not let it be your great death.

Blessed be, Cindy ~ 

© 2016 Seek Cindy.

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To contact me for any readings, including twin flame readings, email me via the email placed at the top. I use numerology, and intuition to determine if you truly are dealing with a twin flame connection. A mini calculation of both you, and your partner’s life path calculations, any themes and issues that this may present to your Union, and why – including a 1-10 question tarot reading.